Tag Archives: hearing God

Forget about the booming voice. God speaks through burritos.


The assistant pastor was making the case that God wanted him to eat two burritos. As a burrito lover, I can really sympathize. He was saying he never would have ordered two because of the appearance of gluttony. But he got the second little pillow because his kids wanted it for a homeless man outside, who mysteriously disappeared after being promised the prize.

I have heard from God over burritos myself. Specifically, I have fallen in love with the Corona burrito of Van Nuys. It’s now my favorite on top of Pollo Loco, Qdoba, Chipotle and any other respectable burrito.

When I proposed to my family moving to Van Nuys to start a church with the Christian Fellowship Ministries, there was an onslaught of reasons this would not be a convenient move.

Standing against the heat, distance, danger and whatever else everybody objected was this lone burrito which prevailed in reason.

Of course, I’m being extremely facetious (and the burrito is extremely delicious). But I’m always a bit skeptical about “hearing” God’s voice. I prefer finding open and closed doors. What I mean is that you pray, ask for direction and get an impression. If it doesn’t contradict the Word of God, don’t just wildly embrace it but pursue it cautiously. If God opens doors before you, then possibly/probably you’re in His will. If He closes doors in front of you, then you probably not.

If, for example, you’re singled and you think God has told you to marry Mr. Guapito, but he doesn’t agree, possibly it’s not God. Or if you think you should “outreach” to your worldly friends at a party and you keep falling into drunkenness, then probably you’re not hearing God.

So the burrito seems like a good omen (hahaha). I mean, what could be anti-Biblical about opening a church, saving souls, making disciples? The heat of Van Nuys (compared to breezy Santa Monica) is a real downer. Why not find something that compensates for the Valley Boy Pastor (me)?

Superglue in your ear



Not Ferret.

Ryan Liam Upton, 27, squirted superglue into the ear of Ben Ferrett, 28, in 2009 at a party in Brisbane, Australia, in an act of drunken wisdom (‘scuse the sarcasm). It was meant as a joke, but Ferret suffered permanent partial hearing loss.

Don’t let the devil fill your ear with demonic superglue. He does it to keep you from hearing God. Yes, prayer is listening time! You shouldn’t talk only. Stop rifling off requests and take a moment to actually listen to God. He might have a request for you! Or a direction. Or an answer to a question.

When Samuel was a child, he couldn’t recognize the voice of God. He kept going to Eli, his master, thinking it was the high priest who was calling him. After three times, Eli understood that it was God talking to Sammy. Maybe you need to become accustomed to hearing from God. (Of course, He’s not going to tell you to sin.) Communication — and prayer is communication — must be a two way street.

Justice cracked down on Upton. But Ferret still can’t hear that well. Don’t fall to such a fate in your prayers.